Tiny Beautiful Things: Advice on Love and Life from Dear Sugar

When asked for general advice for people in their twenties, Strayed offers that they should be “ten times more magnanimous” than they believe themselves capable of being (147). This is because people in this decade of life tend to lack humility while being insecure at the same time. However, they will grow and develop self-knowledge if they move toward generosity.

A 26-year-old man calls himself Beast because a rare blood disorder has affected his physical development. While he has managed to have a full enough life, he does not consider himself a romantic prospect for anyone and so shuts himself off from this part of life. He wants Sugar to tell him whether it is better to give up on love and concentrate on the parts of his life that are thriving.

Sugar tells him about her friend, a gay man she calls Ian, who was face was physically affected by burns when his kitchen blew up when he was 25. While Ian allowed himself to thrive and take risks with business and friendship, he unequivocally excluded himself from the romantic arena. When he died by suicide at age 44, Sugar intuited that this was because he had shut himself off from romantic love and not because he had been burned in the first place.