On Turning Ten

“On Turning Ten” is a beloved poem by American contemporary poet Billy Collins. Originally intended as a satire in the tradition of “midlife crisis” poems, the poem became a deep and melancholy exploration of what it is to leave childhood behind. It originally appeared in Collins’s 1995 poetry collection “The Art of Drowning,” alongside other noted poems such as “Reading in a Hammock,” “Keats’s Handwriting,” and the titular “The Art of Drowning.”

The poem is broken into five irregular stanzas, each characterizing a shift in tone from the humorous to the more atmospheric and introspective. “On Turning Ten” explores themes of nostalgia, the loss of innocence and magic, and the looming challenge of growing up. Though written in the early- to mid-1990s, the poem contains very little that ties it to one distinctive time period or place; this makes it an accessible piece that can resonate with childhoods around the world.

Poet Biography

Billy Collins was born in Manhattan in 1941. He studied Romantic poetry at the University of California, but his long career would be influenced more by Modern poets such as Karl Shapiro and Reed Whittemore, as well as the poets of the Beat Generation. He is considered one of the most famous and best-loved American poets of all time, known for his conversational, candid humor balanced with poignancy and profound observations of human nature.

Collins has been consistently active in creating and supporting platforms for poets: In 1975, he co-founded the Mid-Atlantic Review; he has acted as Poetry Consultant for Smithsonian Magazine; and he is on the editorial board at The Alaska Quarterly Review. Collins served as American Poet Laureate from 2001 to 2003, and he was the Poet Laureate for New York from 2004 to 2006. He has taught at numerous colleges and universities including Sarah Lawrence College, Columbia University, and the State University of New York. In 2016 he was inducted into the American Academy of Arts and Letters.

His 12 poetry collections to date include The Rain in Portugal, Horoscopes for the Dead, The Trouble with Poetry, Questions About Angels, The Art of Drowning, and others. In the late 1990s, Collins moved his work from the University of Pittsburgh Press to Random House, receiving a six-figure advance for a three-book deal—a shocking turn of events for the poetry community. Since then, he has traveled around the world giving poetry readings to sold-out audiences, performing alongside noted musicians, and holding workshops for emerging poets. Throughout his career Collins has been honored with numerous awards and fellowships including Poetry magazine’s “Poet of the Year” in 1994, the Mark Twain Award for Humor in Poetry in 2005, and the Peggy V. Helmerich Distinguished Author Award in 2016.

Poem Text

Collins, Billy. “On Turning Ten.” 1995. University of Pittsburg Press.

Summary

The poem opens with the narrator lamenting the physical sensation of impending age—worse than a simple passing stomachache or headache, but something more intimate, a deeply embedded assault that will leave him scarred forever onward. The narrator speaks to someone older—the reader, or a parent or grandparent—who tells him he is too young to be so melancholic. He responds by saying they have forgotten what it’s like to be young and vividly aware of each moment, but he can remember each year that he’s passed through.

He recounts some of the personas he has taken on through his childhood: a magician from a storybook, a soldier, a prince. But now, instead of pretending, he sits at the window watching the light streaming in the late afternoon and sees it with new eyes. He looks at his tree house and his bicycle, and they too don’t look the same as they once did. Everything is darker and more solemn than it was in the adventures of his youth.

The speaker acknowledges a new beginning, the entrance to a new level of awareness, and takes a walk through the world of his childhood. He says goodbye to his imaginary friends as he prepares for the turning point awaiting him. It was only yesterday that he felt invincible, like nothing could hurt him. Now he understands that he has become a real person, vulnerable to the physical and emotional pitfalls of life.