Breathing Underwater

Nick writes his poem for English class about Tom without meaning to. He tries writing something different but can only think of Caitlin. He blames the journal for making him remember and convinces himself that if he had told Tom the truth about his father, Tom would have laughed at him.

He continues writing about Caitlin despite knowing that where the story is going makes him uncomfortable. On their way home from Key West, as they drove over a bridge, Caitlin reminded Nick of how he had humiliated her at the bar. She said he became a different person sometimes and disrespected her. Sensing that she was going to break up with him, he swerved the car and almost crashed several times. As he drove, he told Caitlin that his mother had abandoned him because of his father’s abuse, and Nick blamed her for leaving him with “the monster.” He said life without Caitlin would be meaningless and swerved to go over the bridge into the water. Caitlin screamed and turned the steering wheel, making the car go left into traffic. He punched her for the first time to get her away from the wheel.