Alone Together: Why We Expect More from Technology and Less From Each Other

Elaine, 17, prefers texting to calling because it gives her time to construct her thoughts without pressure and often while she is alone. Texting is also more efficient, which is why adults and professionals use it. It’s created a culture where asking for a call can feel like an imposition.

Audrey is 16 and shy and prefers texting to talking. Her parents are divorced, and her brothers are often busy. One reason she doesn’t like calling is she doesn’t like to end the calls. It’s a skill. Turkle’s analysis is that “ending a call is hard for Audrey because she experiences separation as rejection” (191). Audrey spends all day taking pictures to post on Facebook and implies that her profile is a more real representation of how she sees herself than her real-life self. She is also on Italian MySpace, which a group of exchange students introduced her to. She chats with men who message her sometimes. It feels like a fantasy, a place she can play outside the confines of the rigorous college-prep school path she’s on.

Audrey does reveal that when she had to move and say goodbye to a friend, the friend messaged Audrey, and Audrey wishes that had been done over the phone or in person.